brokenpurplecrayon

another of my many varied posts on self-growth, discovery, and being. i feel like this is the biggest recurring lesson of my life. so bear with me as i process it to death (as i will most likely do many many more times after this).

i was having a conversation today with a very good friend. she happens to be twice as old as me (no, that’s not an exaggeration). she was saying how she has learned to appreciate the simple pleasures in her life – she loves her job, she loves singing, she loves riding her bike, she loves a sunny day, she loves taking care of herself. she’s got her share of problems – and she is frequently the one in her family who cares of others when they have problems.

i was nodding as she spoke – listening to her but also flashing to my own simple joys: singing in the car, giving a little child a toy, dancing in the grocery store aisles, filling out the forms and court orders for an adoption, taking naps. i smiled at her and said something like “me too”. and the realization hit me. i followed up my “me too” with “i’m very lucky that i seem to be learning that now – at 31.” she agreed and paid me a huge compliment. she said that i was open and wise for my age.

i was pondering this in the bath this afternoon (before my epic nap) … because all good thinking is done in the bathroom … and i realized that while i may have moments of open and wisdom and zen, i also have my share of moments of projecting, over-thinking (oohh, yes, i remember this lesson!), and having unrealistic expectations. in fact, i had to snap myself out of a couple of those moments today. i caught myself worrying about another person’s *potential* reaction to me. or imagining scenarios of things that *might* happen. instead of just being in that present moment. instead of just being.

yes, i know most of this is a “duh” – because really, who of us do not have our share of enlightenment balanced with our share of humanity? still, it was an intriguing realization and one i felt compelled to document (again).

.:{brokenpurplecrayon}:.